Friday, July 01, 2005

LESSON OF THE DAY 246

Ayahs of the Day:
Then your Lord inspired the angels, "I am with you, so steady those who believe. I will cast fear into the hearts of those who scoff, so strike above their necks, and strike off their fingertips." That is because they contended with God and the messenger of God; and for anyone who contends with God and the messenger of God, God is severe in punishment.[8: 12, 13]


Hadith of the Day:
Allah said, 'I am the Most Merciful, I created kinship, and I derived it from My name. I will maintain those who maintain it, and I will cut loose those who sever it.' [Bukhari]

Wise Quote of the Day:
Four things are from the darkness of the heart - a full stomach without caring (whether it is halal or haram); keeping the company of oppressors; forgetting past sins; and being under the delusion that one's lifetime will surely be long. [Abdullah ibn Masud radi Allah anhu]

Guidance of the Day:
Complex, fulfilling relationships don't suddenly appear in our lives fully formed. Rather, they develop one encounter at a time. If you could carefully observe and analyze those encounters--you would see how each one is made up of many small exchanges. There's a bid and a response to that bid. Like cells of the body or bricks of a house, such exchanges are the primary components of emotional communication. Each exchange contains emotional information that can strengthen or weaken connections between people.

Positive responses to a bid typically lead to continued interaction, often with both parties extending more bids to one another. Listening to this kind of exchange is kind of watching to a Ping-Pong game in which both players are doing well. But a negative response to a bid typically shuts down emotional communication. All bids cease. The game is over. People want to pick up their Ping-Pong paddles and go home.

Bids typically grow in intensity and frequency as a relationship grows and deepens. How did it become possible? One small interaction at a time. And how do you keep it afloat? By continuing to make bids to one another for connection, and by continuing to respond to one another's bids, moment by moment in positive ways. While the process sounds simple, most people can think of many relationships in their lives that have gone awry because of failed bidding or failed responses to bids. [The Relationship Cure]

Food for Thought:
The test of good manners is to be able to put up pleasantly with bad ones. Hot words never resulted in cool judgment. Only the brave know how to forgive.

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