Friday, March 17, 2006

LESSON OF THE DAY 499

Ayah of the Day:
And God has favored some of you over others in substance; and those who have been favored are not about to turn their substance over to those who are under their control, such that they would be equal in that respect. Will they refuse the kindness of God? [16: 71]

Hadith of the Day:
Faith is known experientially by those who are content with God as their Sovereign, with Islam as their religion, and with Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) as their messenger. [Bukhari]

Wise Quote of the Day:
The reward of every virtue has it's measure, yet the reward for patience has no measure, [Abu Bakr radi Allah anhu]

Guidance of the Day:
The next time you find yourself in an argument, rather than defend your position, see if you can see the other point of view first. It's interesting to consider that when you disagree with someone, the person you are disagreeing with is every bit as certain of his or her position as you are of yours. Yet we always take sides--ours! This is our ego's way of refusing to learn anything new. It's also a habit that creates a lot of stress. Rather than automatically defending your own position, see if you can learn something new. Don't try to correct your friend see how he is wrong. Let your friend have the satisfaction of being right. Practice being a good listener.

Contrary to popular belief, this attitude does not make you weak. It doesn't mean you aren't passionate about your beliefs, or that you are admitting that you are wrong. You are simply trying to see another point of view--you're seeking first to understand. It takes enormous energy to constantly prove a rigid position. On the other hand, it takes no energy to allow someone else to be right. In fact, it's outright energizing.

When you understand other positions and points of view, several wonderful things begin to happen. First, you often learn something new. You expand your horizons. Second, when the person you are talking to feels listened to, he or she will appreciate and respect you far more than when you habitually jump in with your own position. Jumping in only makes him or her more defensive. Almost always, if you're softer, the other person will be softer too. It might not happen right away, but in time, it will. By seeking first to understand, you are putting your love and respect for the person to whom you are speaking above your need to be right. You are practicing a form of unconditional love. A side benefit is that the person you are speaking to may even listen to your point of view. While there is no guarantee that he will listen to you, one thing is guaranteed: If you don't listen, he or she won't. By being the first person to reach out and listen, you stop the spiral of stubbornness. [Don't Sweat The Small Stuff]

Food for Thought:
The more you have a harmonious, loving, accepting approach, the more you will see the rest of the pieces all fitting nicely together.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

is unconditional love for a person permissible?